More Stupid Headlines

Norwegian Mistakenly Burns Cash for Heat
OSLO, Norway - A Norwegian who felt a bit chilly after a night on the town and decided to stoke his fireplace didn't really have money to burn. It just turned out that way. What he realized too late was that the paper he used to start the blaze was a stack of bills, worth about 15,000 kroner (US$2,400), the regional newspaper Avisa Nordland reported Thursday. "I came home late at night after a party, and wanted a beer before I went to bed," he told the newspaper. "It was cold in the living room, but there was a glow in the wood stove." So the man, identified only as being his 50s, grabbed a handful of paper next to the stove and tossed it in. "I discovered too late that the envelope of money had fallen onto the floor with the kindling paper," he said. He said the cash had been payment for an artwork he had sold earlier in the day.

Man Allegedly Tries to Swap Pot for Tires
SACRAMENTO, Calif. - A man who unsuccessfully tried to barter with marijuana was arrested for stealing two auto tires after the deal was rejected, Roseville police said. Joshua Dean Williams, 20, and another man allegedly tried the pot-for-tires swap at a Sears Auto Center, said police spokeswoman Dee Dee Gunther. When the sales clerk refused, one of the men swung at the worker with a baseball bat, Gunther said. The worker avoided being struck and threw a rock at the car, shattering a window. The suspects grabbed two tires and drove off, Gunther said. The duo returned to the store about an hour later looking for the worker who broke their window, said Tim Thompson, assistant manager of the tire shop. The two fled after workers recognized them, but police were able to nab Williams and arrest him on suspicion of robbery, Gunther said. Williams was being held in the Placer County jail in lieu of $50,000 bail. The second suspect was still at large.

Newborn Twins Named Yasser and Arafat
GAZA CITY, Gaza Strip - When Safra Hassan went into labor Thursday, she told her husband she wanted to name their child Yasser after Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat (news - web sites), who died hours earlier. It was only in the delivery room at Gaza's Shifa Hospital that Hassan, 32, discovered she was carrying twin boys. "I looked at my husband and I said, we will call them Yasser and Arafat," she told The Associated Press. "I'm so proud that the name of Yasser Arafat will be in my house every day, just as the name of Yasser Arafat will be in every Palestinian house forever." Safra Hassan said naming her infants for Arafat was a small gesture compared to the sacrifices he made in pursuit of Palestinian statehood. "I hope that my children will grow up in peace and will witness Yasser Arafat's dreams become reality," she said.

Woman's Road Rage Targets Wrong Car
CHEHALIS, Wash. -- A Chehalis woman who was angry at her ex-boyfriend for seeing another woman rammed the wrong car when she tried to get even with him, police said. he 43-year-old woman from Curtis, west of Chehalis, ran a Chevrolet Sprint off the road at about 6:30 a.m. on Tuesday, police said. Police said the woman was stunned to see the man who got out of the car was not her boyfriend, but instead a volunteer firefighter. "Oh My God, Oh My God. That's not my boyfriend," she reportedly told a Washington State Patrol trooper. The woman had mistaken the red 1987 Chevrolet Sprint for her boyfriend's maroon 1988 Chevrolet Spectrum, police said. The woman was jailed on suspicion of vehicular assault.